I knead your help

Hi, dear friend / coworker / acquantance / passerby / human / googlebot,

I’d like to send you some cookies! Please let me send you some cookies.

Cookies?

I’ve been bitten by a baking bug for the last year and a half.

I have also been very, very fortunate in having housemates willing and able to put up with prodigious quantities (and some questionable experiments) involving sweet baked goods in lockdown. Even so, despite our collective talent in sugar consumption, our belt buckles and tooth enamel strained to keep up. Well, my belt buckles have struggled at least. Everyone else’s are probably doing fine.

One outlet that has alleviated some of our workload has been mailing cookies! Cookies-by-mail has been working pretty well for a couple reasons. One, cookies generally can be packaged to hold up and stay good for a while. You don’t need to involve compicated things like ice packs. Two, USPS Priority Mail is economical, quick-ish, and at least sometimes isn’t delayed by a week or more. Even if it is, the cookies are usually still pretty okay.

It’s been a lot of fun trying out various cookie recipes, baking batches, and sending them out. I’d like to keep doing it in post-pandemic life.

So I guess it comes down to this: I’d like to make lots more weird cookies, but I need more outlets to channel them into.

Get your hand in the jar

Here’s how it will work:

Sign up using the google form. A password is required to sign up.
- If you know me and would like cookies and don’t know the password, shoot me a message.
I’ll send you some cookies from time to time. The cookies will come in a USPS Small Flat Rate box.
I’ll post about the cookies that get made on this blog.

You’ll get cookies, probably, I don’t know, about once per month or so? It’ll probably about that as a baseline. Perhaps less frequently if it’s a busy time, or more frequently if it’s a stressful time.

If you’re interested in recipes, I’ll post and/or talk about them here. For experiments, I’ll talk about things I tried along the way, or variations I tried that wound up in your box. For what it’s worth, a fair number of the experiments will tend toward playing around with dietary restriction substitutions, since amongst my family memebers there are folks with gluten, egg, and dairy allergies/sensitivities (all in different people, thankfully).

For examples of types of things I might do, see these pilot posts:

For what might be up next, look here.

Warnings and caveats

You’ll probably get a wide variety of cookie-adjacent bake products.

Sometimes the cookies will be some sort of established recipe that I just wanted to try out or re-make.
Other times I may want to play around and figure out how to make a cookie with some weird flour or ingredient.
Occasionally, what comes in your box may stretch the definition of what a cookie is. It’ll be an adventure that we’ll all experience together.

Sometimes there may be “failures” in terms of excessive spreading, size, texture, or structural integrity. As long as they’re sufficiently tasty, I’ll probably still send you those instead of throwing them out.

FAQs

Who is making the cookies?

I am making the cookies. Please direct complements to me.

Will the cookies be good?

I make no particular promises; however, my esteemed cookie control team (read: whoever is in the same building as me at the time the cookies are made) will ensure top standards of product quality are met.

Please direct complaints to them.

How much for the cookies?

The cookies are free.

How do you plan to make money?

I don’t know, but when the investors come calling, I’ll scramble to figure something out. Perhaps I’ll start putting ads into the cookie boxes. Maybe we’ll achieve self-baking cookie nirvana before I run out of VC dosh. If that doesn’t work… maybe… blockchain sprinkles?

Don’t worry, I’ve got the simulations running for this. If you have the password to the form, don’t be shy! I’ll let you know if I have to dial it back a bit.

Let me know!

But really, I’d like to pay for the cookies.

I am very fortunate and do not need cookie bux. Seriously!